The best-laid schemes o’ mice an’ men / Gang aft agley.
- Robert Burns, To a Mouse
I kind of accidentally became a father this weekend. Well, “accidentally” might bring up the wrong connotations here; this was coming eventually – everyone knew it – I just wasn’t expecting it to happen in the middle of nowhere, Pennsylvania!
About this time last year I attended Legacy, a live-action role playing game held at the Faire Play campsite in Montrose and run by several of my friends , for the first time. As a long-time roleplayer but LARPing virgin, I expressed my fears at trying something new; as the season progressed I found that I enjoyed it quite a bit, despite the cold and wet and sometimes terrible “That Guy” roleplayers that I would encounter. Legacy’s inaugural season ended in November of last year the weekend before my wedding, and I was eager for April to roll around once more in order to go back.
I saw a black Volkswagen Golf on the road today. It had a complete blackout kit – including a custom jet black Wokwagen logo on the hatchback – and the windows were tinted darker than a Nazi SS officer’s uniform. However, the icing on the cake was its license plate, which proudly read BLTZKRG. That’s right, ladies and gentlemen: I encountered Die Reichswagen on the way to a doctor’s appointment.
When it comes to superhero movies, I tend to have questionable taste. No, I don’t think that Batman & Robin is a cinematic masterpiece – I’m not that bad – but I was the only one among all my friends who actually enjoyed that first Hulk movie directed by Ang Lee. On top of that, the Bryan Singer-directed Superman Returns starring Brandon Routh was a pretty bad as well but I have to admit enjoying it; for all my supposed education sometimes I just like superhero movies, even if they’re bad. I draw the line at the Ghost Rider and Green Lantern movies, though; I have standards, even if they’re low ones.
I’m not going to sit here and argue that the recent Boston Marathon bombing wasn’t that bad. 3 people are dead, more than 150 wounded – many of which were injured so severely that they have lost limbs – no one can possibly say that the attack wasn’t a tragic, horrific occurrence. At the same time, things could have been much, much worse – and we need to thank our lucky stars for that.
So I was sick all day yesterday, which left me wanting to more or less drown myself in the toilet bowl. The only reason I didn’t was because I would have had to clean it first. I mean, let’s be honest – who wants to die with their lungs full of dirty toilet water?
Happy birthday, asshole.
I hate April. I have for years. This week only solidifies how much fear and loathing I experience every calendar year when this bastard month rolls around; it’s gotten to the point where I can’t even enjoy my birthday any more, considering I share it with Adolph Hitler of all people.
